Not There

An Englishman was walking through the Markets in Belfast late at night when the inevitable masked and armed man jumped out of an alleyway.
'Give us your money!' demanded the gunman.'
'Certainly not, said the Englishman, knocking the gun out of his hand and jumping on him.
The two of them fought for three hours, until finally the gunman got his hands on the Englishman's wallet and opened it. Three moths from an extinct species flew out, and in the bottom of it he found 3p.
'Good God, man,' said the gunman. 'Do you mean to tell me you fought me for three hours to save yourself 3p?'
'Not at all,' said the Englishman. 'I thought you were after the £500 in my shoe.'