A bad day

Pat had had a bad day. Lost on the horses, no luck on the lottery, laid off from work, his lot was not a happy one. Intent on drowning his sorrows he strode in to Toolan's pub and made his way to the bar.

In front of him, lying prostrate and obviously totally comatose lay big drinking Jim McPhee.

'What do you want?' asked Mickey Toolan.

'I want to get like McPhee as soon as possible,' said Pat.

'Right,' said Toolan. And smashed him across the head with a baseball bat.