The Tale of The Labourer

The new labourer arrived at John Burke's farm. John called to the haybarn to see how his new man was getting on. The labourer was standing looking about him. 'What's wrong?' asked John.
'Well I feel like a flea in a nudist camp/ said the man, 'I know what to do but I don't know where to begin.'
That labourer was soon fired. He went abroad on holidays and sent the farmer a card with the usual greeting, 'Wish you were here' on it. Whether by accident or design, the picture was of Sing-Sing Prison.
When his replacement arrived his first statement was:
'I have a pressing question to ask.'
John replied: 'Oh hop out behind the pig-sty there.'
'What did you work at before?' asked John of the new man.
'A very dangerous job. Putting the holes in doughnuts,' said the man.
'Well at least you had the courage of your confections,' said John.
The labourer was always entering for competitions and didn't realise that he was spending an amount of money on stamps and entry fees. John: 'You're always at it and all you ever win is combs, brushes, shaving cream, razors - you never win the big prize. You'll be broke doing them.' Labourer: 'I may be broke. But 111 be the best groomed pauper around here.'